Dogs are Socially Gifted

Dogs can teach us how to socially connect. I didn’t realize the extent of their gifts until we started living with our dog Mac, who we got as a puppy. Before we realized it, my husband and I were figured out, bamboozled, manipulated into providing walks, treats, tummy rubs. Before we knew what had happened he had pushed his way out of his crate and was sleeping upstairs in our room every night. He brought the family together with his desire to connect and be connected. Even though the scientific jury is still out about whether dogs have theory of mind (the ability to recognize beliefs, desires, and intentions of others), the anecdotal evidence of dog owners is that they seem to read minds. How do they do this? They are exquisitely attuned to social cues, gestures, and body language. They can follow a pointing gesture, which is a cognitive skill related to language development. They also have social skills that bind them to others. One of the skills that holds the social world together for the dog is the greeting ritual. Our dog is an enthusiastic greeter. Mac’s greetings are whole body affairs involving grabbing a shoe or a toy in his mouth, wagging his tail and his head, wiggling his torso, going in circles, and making a racket. When you are greeted by Mac you feel like a king or a queen. This skill alone is instructive. When I get into the car and forget to greet the dog, and my husband will say “Did you forget someone?” I will turn and see Mac in the back seat, nose on the headrest, waiting to be acknowledged and brought into relationship. Teachable moment indeed.